I am a human. Rebellious is my nature and I hate God. I have heard of him from parents and society and this overrated being has done nothing for me. I can't see him therefore he doesn't exist.
A Dog is real. I love my pet, I nurture him and he loves me back and even protects me in time of need. The only problem with a Dog/ a pet is that they die before we do and then we get another one to love us and protect us.
God on the other hand, they say, lives forever. He is unborn and undying. He is within and pervades within the whole existence. Even though I hate God and all the people who call themselves religious; I am fascinated by the descriptions. I have the urge to know the truth. Does he exist or not? Is God a reality or a fantasy?
The only way to know is to look within they say but I look at the state of the world and declare that God can't be perfect because if he was perfect then this world of his creation wouldn't be so flawed. So there I said my piece and I give up on him.
I know they said going within is the way to find him but that's too hard. I am too busy anaysing what my eyes see, how can I close my eyes and shut my internal chatter for a minute? Besides, why should I waste my time on something that can't be seen by the world and can't make me money that the world worships. I am fascinated though, only if I could talk to someone who can tell me more about God, if he exists that is. One day in my spare time, I may follow that up.
Christians say 'God is Love', so I love my dog and I do charity by giving money to a church or non-profit organisation. That is enough; should a God exist who wants answers after I die? Die I must, sooner or later....
Death will take away my body. Would I still exist without my body? What shall I do without my body? Would I be able to see without eyes then? Would I be able to smell and taste food? Would I be a ghost and fly around the earth, seeing my loved ones? What's the point if they can't see me? What else would I do with myself when I am dead? I mean when my body is dead.
Well, I travel places in my dreams, incidents happen and I react to them. What world do they exist in? Is that reality or fantasy? I should keep a diary of my dreams then I would have a better idea of where I go and what do I engage myself with in my dreams. It should give me some clue to what is possible to do without walking on my feet, without talking with my mouth and with my eyes closed.
If I can go elsewhere in my dreams then I should be able to do it while I am awake. Why don't I pretend sleep? Ok, I will close my eyes and fool my brain into thinking that I am sleeping and note where I go, what I do. If nothing else, my eyes need that rest, away from the rat race. Oh, who doesn't like a minute of peace. Finally I got to relax. It feels nice. May be I should do this everyday. Just five minutes for me.
Close my eyes and just be an observer. No plans, just watch. What am I watching, there is nothing to see? Can I hear any noises, without looking? How does that feel? Turn my ears off and note if I can smell anything. What kind of sensations my body is experiencing now? It's amazingly relaxing. I like resting for a while. I am glad I took a few minutes from my busy life to do this.
I am getting addicted to this relaxation. I want more time. I will spare some time every morning and evening for closing my eyes and being the observer. Going for a quiet walk at lunchtime is fun too. I can't close my eyes but I watch my breath while I walk. I didn't know that I don't breath equal amount of air from both nostrils. Forcing to breath more from the other doesn't work. I close the one that is not working fine. I breath in from one and let it out of the other and then reverse the cycle to open up the other side. Each day its different but today my right nostril works better than the left.
I am starting to enjoy the breathing game. I like balancing the body with breath. The body has two verticle halves, I breath in and feel one half move up and the other half goes down simultaneously.
This see saw of breath is fun. People call it meditation. I don't mind playing these games. I have started to see a purple light in between my eyes. It's fascinating to watch. There is some shinny stuff in there sometimes. Mostly, I see the purple and black swirls that go anti-clockwise, I think. I can't believe I can see things in my meditation. It is getting more and more interesting. I don't care if I will find God or not but I have definitely found peace.
I wonder, if I continue on this path, may be one day I will find out more. God, if you exist, please help me understand you. I just want to know the truth. Would you help me? I want to talk to you and ask you so many questions. At least, I will not dismiss the possibility that you may exist. I am open to knowing. I will wait for my turn. May be one day will be my lucky day. I have already started this journey and will keep walking.
A Dog is real. I love my pet, I nurture him and he loves me back and even protects me in time of need. The only problem with a Dog/ a pet is that they die before we do and then we get another one to love us and protect us.
God on the other hand, they say, lives forever. He is unborn and undying. He is within and pervades within the whole existence. Even though I hate God and all the people who call themselves religious; I am fascinated by the descriptions. I have the urge to know the truth. Does he exist or not? Is God a reality or a fantasy?
The only way to know is to look within they say but I look at the state of the world and declare that God can't be perfect because if he was perfect then this world of his creation wouldn't be so flawed. So there I said my piece and I give up on him.
I know they said going within is the way to find him but that's too hard. I am too busy anaysing what my eyes see, how can I close my eyes and shut my internal chatter for a minute? Besides, why should I waste my time on something that can't be seen by the world and can't make me money that the world worships. I am fascinated though, only if I could talk to someone who can tell me more about God, if he exists that is. One day in my spare time, I may follow that up.
Christians say 'God is Love', so I love my dog and I do charity by giving money to a church or non-profit organisation. That is enough; should a God exist who wants answers after I die? Die I must, sooner or later....
Death will take away my body. Would I still exist without my body? What shall I do without my body? Would I be able to see without eyes then? Would I be able to smell and taste food? Would I be a ghost and fly around the earth, seeing my loved ones? What's the point if they can't see me? What else would I do with myself when I am dead? I mean when my body is dead.
Well, I travel places in my dreams, incidents happen and I react to them. What world do they exist in? Is that reality or fantasy? I should keep a diary of my dreams then I would have a better idea of where I go and what do I engage myself with in my dreams. It should give me some clue to what is possible to do without walking on my feet, without talking with my mouth and with my eyes closed.
If I can go elsewhere in my dreams then I should be able to do it while I am awake. Why don't I pretend sleep? Ok, I will close my eyes and fool my brain into thinking that I am sleeping and note where I go, what I do. If nothing else, my eyes need that rest, away from the rat race. Oh, who doesn't like a minute of peace. Finally I got to relax. It feels nice. May be I should do this everyday. Just five minutes for me.
Close my eyes and just be an observer. No plans, just watch. What am I watching, there is nothing to see? Can I hear any noises, without looking? How does that feel? Turn my ears off and note if I can smell anything. What kind of sensations my body is experiencing now? It's amazingly relaxing. I like resting for a while. I am glad I took a few minutes from my busy life to do this.
I am getting addicted to this relaxation. I want more time. I will spare some time every morning and evening for closing my eyes and being the observer. Going for a quiet walk at lunchtime is fun too. I can't close my eyes but I watch my breath while I walk. I didn't know that I don't breath equal amount of air from both nostrils. Forcing to breath more from the other doesn't work. I close the one that is not working fine. I breath in from one and let it out of the other and then reverse the cycle to open up the other side. Each day its different but today my right nostril works better than the left.
I am starting to enjoy the breathing game. I like balancing the body with breath. The body has two verticle halves, I breath in and feel one half move up and the other half goes down simultaneously.
This see saw of breath is fun. People call it meditation. I don't mind playing these games. I have started to see a purple light in between my eyes. It's fascinating to watch. There is some shinny stuff in there sometimes. Mostly, I see the purple and black swirls that go anti-clockwise, I think. I can't believe I can see things in my meditation. It is getting more and more interesting. I don't care if I will find God or not but I have definitely found peace.
I wonder, if I continue on this path, may be one day I will find out more. God, if you exist, please help me understand you. I just want to know the truth. Would you help me? I want to talk to you and ask you so many questions. At least, I will not dismiss the possibility that you may exist. I am open to knowing. I will wait for my turn. May be one day will be my lucky day. I have already started this journey and will keep walking.
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